Two crows and a magpie
“Nothing will embitter a soul more than winter’s chill!”
“Nothing, Harry! brrrr… indeed, I’ll say nothing!”
“maybe only their fake cheerfulness … brrrrr!... I’ll tell you, my bill’s so cold I can’t scratch them plumes over behind … shivers going down my back whenever I’d try!”
“you’d say all of it is fake, Harry?!”
Louis was a bulky black fellow, with empty, happy eyes… crowing whenever he could, as if he’d won the lottery every time… Harry was the stoic, phlegmatic, sour type – dark as the night and sarcastic as any Greek philosopher – he liked Louis, or put up with him, because the poor soul was with every passing day more innocent than before (as Harry would often think it!)
“of course, my good man, of course! They all are just a numerous bunch of earth-bounded hypocrites! Will you just look at them?!”
“I don’t know, Harry..”
“you wouldn’t know if it hit you straight between the eyes! … really, Louie, my boy, now stop looking all hazy at me… would you just take a good look at them?!”
“weeeeell… have to admit most of’em do have souls murkier than our plumage! …brrrrr…. – said Louis waggling his feathers – really chilly this evening!”
“now, didn’t I tell you it came to frost our souls?!”
“say, wanna hear a story with’em people and their season’s cheering?!”
“fake cheering!”
“fake indeed! Wanna hear? Wanna?!”
“well, why not? Nothing much to do on this icy branch as it is!”
“know that there well-known hypermarket, they call it The Crossroads?!”
“Yup!”
“was me sitting there, not too many days ago, on one of’em poles… my eyes directed towards one of the windows leading straight to the room where them people get together, the ones you always see coming in the morning, with miserable faces you’d think they’s going to be killed, and leaving at night from that there place, with an attitude you’d say they really was killed and resurrected ..”
“employees.. they call them employees…”
“yeah! Never knew what exactly they’s doing over there.. with that fancy name given to them..employeeeees”
“well, what can I tell you, Louie, my boy?! The word is just a fancy sounding for them not to understand they are slaves!”
“slaaaaves!”
“yes, sir! They don’t like being called slaves, so some guy just came with a new word, and they are so happy now!”
“
what they doing all day, them slaves-employees?!”
“you wouldn’t want to know! poor souls!”
Looking at Louis’s more than usually puzzled look, Harry went on.
“remember when we went out camping in the fields, Lou?! … well… remember we saw some horses toiling and pulling at carriages with logs and corn and stuff?!”
“aha…aha!”
“well that, my boy, is a slave! They get food and a roof over the head for that there toiling all day long!”
“poor devils!”
“yup! These ones here get some stuff… they say it has no odor… then they exchange that there stuff for food, roofs, and clothes – poor fiends, only with that skin over their bodies, they got to cover themselves, otherwise they’d be bound to freeze”
“so they isn’t even getting directly food, and roof, and what’cha call them?”
“clothes, Lou, clothes! And nope, they have to take that odorless stuff and toil some more to provide for themselves what they need for surviving!”
“Man! What a life! Geez, I’d sure hate getting to be one of’em slaves!”
“Ha! Guess not all that shines can be called gold, ei, Lou?!”
Harry did have his moments when he could smile – just like this one, when he would put a grin on his face and give a wink!
“you said it, Harry! Well, as I was tellin’ya: so there, in that there hall, they got all united… and talking and quarrelling.. then there came in a tall sort of a man, big bellied, I’d go as far as to say he was fat! – and all dressed up in red… big black boots he had and a ridiculous red hat with white trims… they all start telling him they’d taken the decision:
It’ll be the same thing for all! No discrimination! So, what if one there comes and buys a loaf of bread and a kilo’ of milk and another comes and buys half the place?!
That there was a young, large woman, speaking as if it were the ends of the world and mercy had to come from the skies! So transfigured was she…
Maybe that one with the bread and the milk hasn’t got no money for more – in this season they all buy more than they can…so that one with the bread and the milk is needy!
Ay, ay, George! – said another one of the ladies, an elderly, dry one, with the face of a pious saint – the Lord knows, those in need, need to be helped!
As I was looking at this scene, Harry, I see in a corner, right under the window, two dandy lads.. tall and thin, extremely well dressed.. wouldn’t say they was the slave kind… ”
“those are the luxury slaves, Lou!”
“they have hierarchies for them slaves, too?!”
“what to do, Louie, everybody nowadays is copying us! Lately, you find hierarchies even among idiots”
“so I see them two fancy-schmancy ones whispering to one-another and I get myself as close as I could to the opening in the wall.
Pierre, how very lame of them! – says a bold-headed one, with a pink shirt and a lilac silk scarf around his neck – can you imagine how poor they must be, thinking they’d save a soul by giving it a two-bits rebut as a useless present?!
Francois, you are just too acute, mon ami! – says the other one, this one with the most ridiculous, smug sweater … looked like a beige blanket with black and pinky stripes – eeeeeeweeee! anyway, he goes on to say, enfin, what do we care? It is good publicity, sales go to the sky, why bother with these grossieres?!”
“you see, Lou?! What did I tell you about them being fake? All day sitting, cranking about, doing nothing, poking at each-other with poisoned words, thinking they must be the belly of the world!”
“yeah! yeah! … then they bring to the fat man in the funny outfit a huge sack, you know, like they get out the garbage in them plastic sacks, just that this was made of something more sturdy-like… they open it and pop! In that there sack, teddy bears!”
“Teddy bears?! Hm! Nice ones?”
“well, to tell you the truth, I wouldn’t be buying one like those to go up-town visiting some Miss! An ugly brown they were… I’d be damned if I didn’t see some with one or even both eyes missing…”
“so low they went, ey? So low!”
“You’ll be sitting like in the ad, Papa Noel! Just like in the ad! You sit there under the Christmas tree and the kids come, but till the parents don’t give you the slip, no bear! You hear me? take the bill, offer the toy! No exceptions whatsoever!
Say there, Harry, you don’t think that slip be the thing they give for food, roofs, and what’cha call them?”
“clothes, Louis! Clothes!”
“aaaa, yes! Clothes!”
“don’t think so, Louie! That slip is something small and white.. that thing they give in exchange for supplies for their survival comes in colors! Not to say, they go in these places, take stuff they need for life, give that there odorless stuff… guess that slip is…. some slip-up, ey?!”
And Harry had another of his grin and wink moments.
“hmmmm… mighty complicated the ways of these poor fiends, ey, Harry?!”
“why shouldn’t they be complicated?! Idiots always complicate their ways!”
“so I says to myself, I says ‘Louis, you gotta see what all the hubbub is about!’ and I goes flying and hopping, flying and hopping…”
“ok, Lou! I get the picture.. stop jumping, you’ll get the branch broken and we’ll have to find ourselves another place for the evening rest!”
“so I get myself in this neat little place, just under the exterior roof, there’s there a little opening and I can see through the glass what’s going on in the big hall, where there be a big fir tree, with glitter in it, and big shinny balls, and long gleaming ribbons and this huge star on top… there that red-dressed fatso with his sack of cheap teddy bears goes and sits himself on this huge chair…”
“oh, yes! Sooooo…same thing! Same thing!!!....”
“what same thing, Harry?!”
“hmmmmm…common strategy… say, them people…they don’t really have that much imagination! I say, so the thing is, they had this stratagem developed!”
“strata….what?!”
“stratagem, Lou! stratagem!”
“brother, do these creatures ever come up with the strangest concepts!”
“It’s like a plan, Louis – you remember the ads in town, and we saw once on a TV screen, in a shop? …remember, that night we went out to that party, and on the way home… in that shop there, were those screens?! Well, then, remember, they said in all that advertisement, that if parents came to shop in the hypermarket with their kids, the little darlings would get presents for Christmas!”
“so why they don’t just call it a plan, Harry? Why they call it a strataaaa….stratoooo …..stratammmm…”
“stratagem, Louis, stratagem!”
“yeah! why?!”
“because they think if they invent more words, it makes them look smart!”
“to me it just sounds like sheer loss of time! Instead of thinking of more plans, they just doing the same plan, and inventing different words about it!”
“Louie, you are just too acute, mon ami! Too acute! He-he-he”
Harry, in spite of the chilling cold, seemed like he was coming to feel quite well, giving grins and winks every now and then.
“hihi, Harry! hi-hi! So, I puts myself over there in the little slit beneath the big blue roof and the inner glass roof, and I sits there and watch the show!
At a time I sees three shabby peoples approaching the tree and the fat man in his red suit .. they’s skinny and kinda sable-skinned with a dull look on all three faces. Makes you wanna cry just looking at’em! They don’t even have one of them wheeled baskets they use to put that stuff they get out of there. They have three bags with foods in it, the man has a bigger bag with the name of the place on it, and a small bag, with some loafs of bread stuffed in it, and the woman has a medium size transparent bag with some cans and some big bottles of colored water.
But I tell you, Harry, I’ve lived some years in this life of mine, and I haven’t seen no face more dismal than that there face of that lean little boy they had with’em!”
“stop shivering your wings, Louis, you’ll get us falling of the damn branch!”
“Sorry, Harry, really sorry – just that there memory of that little brownish face made me tremble!
Anyways, the three of’em gets to the fatso in the suit and the woman shows him the slip…
Fatso takes the slip, looks at it, puts it in a big envelope he had at hand, and gives out a “Yo-ho-ho! What’s your name, little fellow?”
Poor boy was shaking all when he said “Alexandru, sir!”
“yo-ho-ho! Alex, come here and I’ll give you a toy from Santa! Yo-ho-ho!”
And the boy goes shyly at him, takes the teddy bear in his arms, gives a bow to fatso, thanks him, and runs off through the long hallway!
There wasn’t a minute passed, when another three peoples comes – these resembled somewhat those two luxury slaves, Pierre and Francois … all dressed up, walking and talking like they owned the world, both adults with one of them big baskets on wheels, filled to the brim, too – had one of them fancy screens we seen in the windows of shops, huge screen they had there in one of that wheeled basket – the dame looking pretty hot, too – like one of them glamorous starlets we seen on them screens, Harry! he looking like one of’em important guys we seen on TV, you know the kind, they come out of them huge houses, with people around them, some in uniform, and they wearing those bracelets around their wrists…”
“yeah! the hotshots!”
“to say nothing of their brat! arrogant little bastard, he looked like! In his swell outfit and with a look like he was some prince of some sort! eating ice-cream, some fell on an old lady’s boot, never did he say nothing to excuse himself!
Well, they goes round to the fat man in the red suit under the big Christmas tree and they gives him the slip!
Fatso looks at the white little paper and his eyes popping out of his orbits like he was some sort of a snail or something…”
“must have come as a surprise what was written there on that slip, ey, Lou!?” – Harry giving Louis the grin and the wink.
“must have! He chocked a bit seeing it, then with a croaky voice, he goes “Yo-ho-ho! What’s your name, big fellow?”
And the boy tells him in a haughty tone “I am Răducu!”
“Yo-ho-ho, Răducu!” said the man, coughing yet a little, “let me give you a present from Santa!”
And he takes a teddy bear and gives it to the boy.
Look here, Harry, I was wanting to ask you – who’d you think this Santa guy is? The fat man kept on saying from Santa… you think Santa is the manager of the hypermarket or something?”
“if you ask me, I’d say it’s just an erroneous pronunciation of Satan… legend has it this guy, Satan, comes tempting people with stuff so he can take their souls and run off with them…”
“well, might be same guy! Though … don’t know how much of a temptation an ugly, cheap toy can make!”
“well, I’d say it all depends where you’re coming from! Say, like if you’re one of those regular slaves, guess a bit of nothing will do the trick! If you’re one from the luxury lot, you’d expect a bit more in exchange for your soul … who knows?! – maybe they even have a free spirited species among them – the kind that doesn’t give up into temptation … but I heard one saying Every man has his price!”
“say, Harry! what’cha think this Satan guy does with all them souls?!”
“dunno! But if I may have an opinion, he doesn’t seem all that bright as they say he is! … not much value in the souls of these creatures!”
“maybe he be one of those exchanging numerous junk bits for a little something in return … you know, like them poor folks that go with big ballots of plastic bottles to some center and give them there for some coins…”
“must be billions of idiots tempted by toys, trinkets and other totems then – don’t see nobody capable of getting a few coins for a hundred thousand of them souls!”
“funny, thing, Harry! funny thing…”
“what’s so funny?!”- and Harry gives Louis a condescending look.
“well, a few years ago you’d not hear nothing of this Santa guy… I be recalling some other name.. something sounding more local …”
“hmmm… now that you mention it, there was indeed a Moş somebody …. probably it was just Satan going around with a fake name to fool more of them! You know how sneaky they can be – why, some time in the past they used to catch us, corvines, and paint our beautiful black plumage to sell to idiots looking for parrots!”
“you’re telling me! my grandma’s sister ended up in a cage because of this practice!”
“a fate worse than death!”
“lucky she was a wicked little thing – seduced the tomcat and managed to get herself released and ran off! Zuuuuum!”
“that so?!”
“matter of fact! …say, Harry, old boy, but why you’d think he changed his name, then?”
“probably assessed the situation and opted for a new approach – the ‘honesty’s the best policy’ one!”
“most probably …most probably!”
“come to think of it, the new name sounds even better than the old Moş somebody! Has a sort of an imported ring to it!”
“well …coming back to the story … after, I goes out to see what them peoples doing with them ugly toys… so in the parking lot I sees Răducu and his parents going to this big, horrid black box on wheels – brother, do these creatures love them wheels!”
“do they ever!”
“damn ugly box – had a round thing in front, a circle with some lines… looked like one of them pendants those rockers put around their neck!”
“oh, yeah! some German monster!”
“must needs be…must needs be! anyways, they’s putting all that stuff in the back of that there monster and I sees Răducu frustrated, red like a lobster put to boil… he keeps crying out loud, shouting to his mamma…
“That gipsy bum got the same toy like me, mamma! It’s not fair! You saw what shopping they had done! none, none, none! I should have got something big, and expensive, and beautiful! Look at all you bought and what? I got a cheap, ugly bear just like the gipsy??!”
“hmmmm…. Now, where was it that I saw it written… Liberté, égalité…..”
“again, you is starting speaking like them Pierre and Francois, brother!”
“Yes! Of course! Liberté, égalité, fraternité! Paris, of course! Eeeeehee…those were the times, mon ami ! Those were some times…”
“well, thing is when the brat started to bang the side of the ugly box, his mother shook him a little and told him it was good he got the teddy bear for free – “now we have something to give to Vasile… the poor fellow is such a good porter, he never asks for salary raises… he has a child, a girl – we really should give him something for her! 
The teddy bear is perfect! I’ll just put a ribbon from one of my cosmetic gift cases, and that’s one solved! Now, dear, you don’t cry….mamma and papa will buy you something nice!”
“Plus! – said the father – Santa is coming to town this week-end! You’ll get loads and loads of expensive stuff that is really nice!”
Here that, Harry!? he’s coming to town in the week-end…”
“Liberté, égalité…”
“well, then I goes further, to the ends of the parking lot… there I sees the depressed, skinny family… the boy kept hold of the teddy bear, not talking, just skipping...
Woman asked the man if they was taking the bus back home… man said he hadn’t bought no tickets... had paid the light and the gas… had to see what was coming up for the next year… still the woman said they's getting on the bus, maybe nobody comes asking them for no ticket!"
“Liberté, égalité… say, Louis, you remember me saying that this appears to be a common stratagem, ey?!”
“yeah! yeah! …strata-something…!”
“well, you know, a few days ago I was hanging around that stylish place over on the north side of the city… that called Former Forest Mall…”
“saaaaay, you seen something similar there?!”
“that’s what I’m saying, Louie, that is precisely what I am saying! Now, hear this story!
So, in the big hall at the entrance there is the big tree…light-bulbs, globes, little stars in it, big star on top – the works!
Now there’s this big guy, big belly, red outfit – red hat with white trimming and big black boots..”
“say, Harry, you wouldn’t think it’s the same fatso?!”
“don’t think so! But the stratagem is almost the same… one little variance, the kind that makes all the difference!”
“let me have it, Harry! let me have it!”
“stop pounding, Louis! You’ll get the branch broken!... so, as I was saying… the fat man with the big sack…
Then I see this boy coming with his parents, you’d think they were all made of gold! What clothes! What shoes – must have given much of that odorless stuff in exchange… she looked like one of them fancy blonds down on Champs-Élysées sitting sipping fancy cocktails at them expensive cafés, he looked like he just won some Oscar for some Hollywood film… not to say what they had their baskets full of – bottles of old wine, foie gras, caviar, French perfume – oh, mercy! liberté, égalité …. Lou, Lou, Lou! the things they had! The things I recall!”
“say, Harry, that fancy stuff – is it any good?!”
“any good??! Louie, Louie, if Satan would only come to tempt me with some of it!”
“that good, hmmm?!”
“well… no use lingering on memory lane …never helped nooo body with nooo thing! So – they looked like they were made to shine! The child, you’d think he was the prince of Persia! Can’t say I was impressed much of his manners, either – haughty as an Egyptian high priestess… well, they get at the tree and the fat man and give him the slip!
So the funny dressed man goes out
“Yo-ho-ho! Come here precious one and tell me your name!”
“I am Luca!” said the boy.
“Well, Luca, Santa has for you something special!” and gives him a super toy, a little model of that them four-wheeled boxes they go around in… a red one, Italian thing it is.. I remember one vacation at Rimini… uhuuu! … well, anyways, was that there boy ever happy for the gift! It had a small device of some sort, made the red thing go from here to there almost as fast as us!”
“Good golly! That fast??!”
“I’m telling you! that there thing got the boy and his parents all stirred up, jolly as can be!
Well, soon after these three left, came another family of three … looking normal…young and fresh… and just very neat and normal…
The man had a small bag, with some little stuff in it.. I heard the woman saying “we’ll keep this for New Year’s Eve, love!”
They gave the small white paper to the fat man… and he had his eyes growing large, big and round like he was turning into an owl!
“Yo-ho-ho! Come here you and tell me your name!”
“Hello, sir! My name is Mihăiţă!”
„well, there, Mihăiţă, Santa has a little something for you!” – and he gave the boy a big chocolate tablet.
So, I see these three coming out of the place, I follow and listen to what they were talking. Mihăiţă asked politely if he could have some chocolate. Mother said no, he had better wait until they went home, ate and had chocolate for desert.
The boy gives his mother the chocolate and as she is getting to put it in the bag her husband had, she sees something on it, written.
“Well! Would you look at this! The expiry date is two weeks from now!”
“that figures!” – says the man.
As they pass by a garbage bin in the parking, the woman throws the tablet into it.
“no use having almost-expired food!”
The little boy puts his head down – “come on, little chap! – says the man, caressing his head – we’ll get you another one at the Mega Vision store next to home, ok?!”
And while the boy was starting to skip, the woman says “Oh! I think I see our bus in the distance, let’s make a run for it, boys!”
But what would you think, Louis?! What would you think?!”
“I don’t know, Harry, what do I think?!”
“well, I’ll tell you! as these peoples throw the almost-expired chocolate, they pass by the other three peoples… the ones with the red thingy controlled by a device to run as fast as we fly…. they are next to one of them big black boxes… huge, this one was! Something resembling a mammoth! Terribly unclassy, too!
Well, as the normal woman goes by and throws the chocolate bar into the bin, this glamorous woman says to her man and child
“Would you just look at that! With all the hunger in the world, and people throwing food to the garbage! I never! Some are simply heartless! Heartless, I tell you!”
“what can we do, Marta? Some simply can’t be charitable, they prefer to throw away what they don’t want, instead of sharing!”
“but mum, the chocolate was expiring in two weeks!”
“so what, Luca!? So what?! Poor people are dying for a crumb of bread, and they throwing food because of some little inconvenience?!”
„but mum, you always throw food!”
„yes, but we are not poor, my precious!”
„well, who cares anyway! Gee, mum, dad – this car is simply awesome! Guess the guys at school will go green with envy!”
„guess they will, precious! Oh, Tavi, did you remember to pay the tax for Luca’s school?! You know, the three thousand that we have to give for the next semester?!”
„Yes, Marta!”
„mum, can I take it to school when vacation is over?!”
„of course, precious! And after you’ve played long enough with it and had enough of it, we will give it to Gheorghe! He’s such a fine porter, never asks for salary raises! And he has a child...”
„but Gheorghe has a daughter!”
„Tavi, are you starting again with your macho attitude and your misogynic ideas! What if she is a girl??! Can’t a girl play with cars, or what?!”
Can’t say I’ve heard the rest of the conversation among them, cause they got into the horrific box and went away really fast – faster than us!”
„I’d love to see them flap their featherless wings and fly!”
„Ain’t happening, Louie, ain’t happening!”
„just once....”
„ain’t never happening!”
„hey, there, guys! How are you?!”
As Louis and Harry turn left, they see Sandy, a coquette magpie, coming up to them.
“what’s up, Sandy, baby?!” – says Louis, all agitated.
“yeah, what’s up?” – says, slightly intimidated, Harry.
“oh, I happened to pass by and stopped for a moment on the branch behind you! I heard your stories! Fascinating!”
“yeah! yeah! really cool ones, ey, Sandy, baby?!”
“indeed! fascinating!”
“good thing you were on the branch behind and could listen to them, Sandy” – Harry always felt a little at a loss when females came over, so he turned to sarcasm for help.
“oh! but I have one of my own! wanna listen to it, boys?!”
“do we wanna?! Of course we wanna, Sandy, baby!”
“well, yes!” – Harry became dry as a salted fish, again.
“just the other day I was chilling at that hypermarket, Ocean’s, that over-sized place in the west part of the city. Well, as I was going round the building I hear through an open window a discussion among the manager of the place over there and his boss, the one taking care of all their stores over here, in this part of the worlds… so they are furious.. yelling at one another like they’ve gone crazy or something!
You know I don’t like listening to other people’s private conversations …”
“oh, Sandy, baby! you are a lady! a lady among ladies!”
“we wouldn’t dream of thinking such a thing, Sandy!”
“but these guys were really screaming…so… I guess I couldn’t resist the impulse!”
“oh, Sandy, baby – you adorable little thing, how to resist them impulses?!”
“well, idea is they were saying that they had come up with a plan!”
“a plan!!!” – and Louis’s eyes flickered with interest.
“I can just see the whole stratagem!”
“funny thing is, it was the very same thing as in your stories… they had put up a big Christmas tree, in the big hall way… and they had hired a guy…some Cristi… a freelancer…to play the part of the one giving out the presents to the kids… but something went terribly wrong!
The manager of the place was saying – “how was I supposed to know that guy wanted to visit Africa?!?! You think I go asking people what they want to do five years from now when I hire them for a crappy one-day job?!”
“I don’t care, Renaud, I just don’t care! The guy has gone with the products and we are stuck with the campaign!”
“not that they were much of a products.. they were some stuff we had to get rid of…”
“Renaud.. you are not listening to me! I don’t care! We have to do something to fix the situation! …. Africa, he went to Africa?!”
“yes! Can you imagine?! The man had a dream.. he wanted to visit Africa!”
“with our products?!? .. well, couldn’t he have done it on his own money?!”
“to tell you the truth, Thomas, he didn’t go on our money… “
“well how the hell did he raise that kind of money, anyway? Don’t know too many people in this God-damned country who can afford a trip to Africa!”
“exactly! Maybe just some of the local nababs! But these poor imbeciles working for the money… no way!”
So, as they were talking…”
“say, Sandy, baby, what is it that thing.. money?!”
“money?! Louie, baby, why money is that thing they get for working and after they use for getting stuff they need… to live and all that!”
“the odorless thing!”
“exactly! They say it is the eye of Satan!”
“that sooooo!” – and Harry puts on his pensive allure.
“why, that is amazing! So… presents…. Santa …Satan… money… strata….strato…stratae-something! Now it all makes sense!”
“it does?!” – somehow Harry and Sandy’s question came out in the same time, as if they were singing in a choir.
“don’t you see the circle?!” – and Louis, fervently, flaps round and round his black wings, while his empty eyes roll with childish glee.
Harry, in a panic, remembers not to embarrass his friend in front of Sandy and whispers to him: “Lou, please, stop flapping…you’ll get us all off this damn branch!”
“well, circle or no circle, let me go on with the story! So, as those two were debating there about that Cristi – the man with the dream to go to Africa – in comes this sassy, bad-assy, not-too-classy woman.
“Mihaela, mon amie! You know Thomas Heinrich, the general manager?”
“Hello, Thomas! I am Mihaela, the assistant of Renaud!”
“Hello, Mihaela!”
“well, Renaud, I have come to tell you about this whole business with this Cristi-guy!”
“well, what do you know, che… Mihaela…?!”
“so, the man has made, somehow, a clip that appeared on TV – he asked for small donations – he wanted to go to Africa to give to the poor African children toys! His campaign was brilliant, they tell me!”
“who told you, Mihaela?”
“why, Thomas, I have heard it from the lady that is the logistic department, who knows it from the girls with the cleaning, that have it from the mailman, who has a cousin who is this Cristi’s neighbor! Anyway, as I understand, the campaign was exquisite – he, Cristi, came and said that everybody is giving out food and clothes and medicine to the Africans – but that the poor little children, nobody thinks that kids want to play…and African kids have no toys… and it is so sad to be a child with no toy!”
“damn brilliant! Why didn’t we think of that?!”
“Why, indeed, Renaud! Why?! We could have hit the jackpot!”
“next year, Thomas, next year!”
“well, gentlemen – Cristi went to Africa with the products taken from here… and he made a smashing campaign! Nothing big, of course – but he went to some very poor places, put on his suit – by the way, also given by us! – gave out presents to the children and made photos… he made himself a portfolio – made a blog and put them.. wrote of his experience over there…wrote some impressions and some testimonials of the African kids and their parents!”
“the man’s a genius! Renaud, why didn’t we think of this??!”
“next year, Thomas, next year!”
“but what’s he doing with the portfolio, Mihaela? Do we know what he aims at?!”
“well, Thomas – as I have it, it seems he wants to go to Brussels with it!”
“to Brussels!”
“yes! As I understand, he wants to ask the E.U. for funds… he is a charity freelancer… and he wishes to promote E.U. values ..”
“genius! I’m telling you! brilliant! Renaud, why didn’t we think of this??!”
“next..”
“don’t next year me, Renaud! just don’t! … and why the hell did you give him three weeks in advance the products and the outfit and all??! Why?”
“well…”
“well, what?!”
“pardon me, Thomas, but I think the time to be angry is not now!”
The two men looked at the sassy woman – they couldn’t believe they actually heard one of these people over here contradicting one of them…
“look, gentlemen! This is no time to be quarrelling – really!”
“Yes! True! But what do we do about the campaign?!”
“well, I’ve thought of it! I know what we can do!”
The two men seemed hit like by thunder – they couldn’t grasp the idea that not only were they given instructions, safeguard instructions, from a woman, but a woman from these parts of the world?!
That was just too much for them … as it seemed to me!
“Well, I was thinking, we get ourselves a new guy in a red outfit – but this time we get a photographer, one with a decent camera (my cousin can fill in that position on short notice!) and we put him with the camera and the red suit under the tree – the couples, with kids, come with the slips… and the guy takes a shot of them! And we put all photos into a box…and organize a raffle… we give out a prize to some family!”
“why yes! Yes! Mihaela…mon am… ouuuuu…amie!.. you are really a friend…”
“A friend in need is a friend indeed, Renaud!”
“indeed, indeed, Mihaela!”
So, while these two where quite happy..”
“people are strange!”
“they certainly is, Harry, they most certainly is! go on, Sandy, baby!”
“so, as I was saying, while these two were quite happy with the outcome, the general manager was thinking out loud…”
“most probably giving indications!”
“precious indications, Harry, precious!”
“well, boys, he was telling them that they’d advertise in the last minute: the prize would be a one-week vacation in Dubai, Burj Al Arab and nothing less, all expenses included!
Renaud and the woman asked him if that wasn’t a bit too much – and what do you think he said?!”
“not at all! For the clients, nothing is too much! Sandy, baby, have you never heard people say: ‘our client is our master!’?”
“a bit too sandy for my taste… Dubai, of course!” – and Harry quivered a bit.
“well, boys, he said that the winner of the prize will be none other than himself! Himself and a certain Roxana! And of course, their son, Marco!
Well, after that talk among the three, the saw-called Thomas went out very happy, telling them
“don’t you worry, I have some very influential friends in Brussels, some even working for the E.U. institutions – I’ll have that bastard Cristi nailed down the moment he appears there!”
So, this guy goes out and Renaud and Mihaela remain alone in the office.
“but who is Roxana, mon amour?!”
And Mihaela places herself in the arms of the man.
“well, you see… Roxana is Thomas’s … well… soul-mate!”
“but isn’t Thomas married to Lucia?! That very rich Italian woman?!”
“well… yes…officially…yes!”
“so… Roxana is…his…”
“the woman he loves!”
Mihaela looks at him with surprise.
“well, he loves her for ten years now! They have a very serious, long lasting relationship! They have a boy together, Marco, who is seven years old! It is very serious!”
“well, mon amour, I should think so! Ten years, child and all! But why doesn’t he divorce Lucia…and…”
“why, Lucia…and even Thomas… they are Catholics! Moreover, they have two children…. how can they divorce?!”
“well, you are a Catholic too!”
“well, yes! But I am not married!”
“or I do not know of it yet!”
“I am not, I am not, my little princess – I tell you I am not! Anyway, Lucia is very rich – it would ruin Thomas … to divorce her!”
"But Thomas - isn't he German? a Catholic German? that is rare...no?"
"Well, my princess... rare or not, he became Catholic to marry Lucia...and can't divorce her!"
“well, to divorce or not to divorce Lucia – he is going to Burj Al Arab with this Roxana and Marco – and in the mean time we have to help Cristi! In the end, we have to prove we’re serious partners!”
At this moment, somebody came outside and over to where I was sitting – so I had to hop to a higher place and couldn’t hear what they were talking… but I did get a glimpse of the heavy smooching they was at!...”
“Sandy, baby! Don’t get me all warmed up for nothing!”
“why, Louie, baby! All for nothing??!”
Harry looked at them with disgust, looked at the branch with distrust, and at the sky with disbelief!
“It takes sheer optimism to cross the jungle and survive – but it takes pure intelligence to live in the jungle and persist!”
Dear ones, the time has come again to talk of Anonyma and Morbid, her friend.
Ages before Morbid had been an eager and most intelligent disciple to the one who seemed to have all the answers in the world, yet as his studies advanced, Morbid understood there were still questions that had not been put and answers nobody had thought of.
“But still, we should consider, he is not one of the many…” said Old Time.
“Brujella is right! Morbid is no danger to us! His youth has made him over-enthusiastic! I’m sure he learnt his lesson well… and it is known, man becomes a subject in his own house, if he is given the proper spouse!” 
“Have patience with me, my handsome black light and I promise I will learn all, even if for this I must not sleep in the night!”
Days and nights went by and Morbid at the window of the white tower would look into the distance, with his huge dark eyes ever searching the horizon.
She sat in front of the huge iron pot stirring into the magic potion… stirring and daydreaming…
But darker did the potion turn when her image rose from underneath … oh how much Anonyma would have liked to send the vision back into the abyss.. 
Come did the king, in a while, with his beautiful queen. Cheers for them and trumpets for all.
Hours later she fell to the ground, with silent Morbid hanging around.
Anonyma found a little place, a clearing in the woods and slowly build a white skinny tower where she would stay.. with Morbid…and…
By tricks and spells she got into the castle, into the chambers of Lola… ah, she wanted just a glimpse of her.. one last look… the one she hated so much it hurt!
One day as Anonyma was coming back from her trips in the forest a young prince had seen her pass by.
So she lowered down her hair and he came up… and fast was their love and hot like the sun. As he left he promised the next day he’d come.
She leaned towards him and looked into his his huge dark eyes... she closed her own… and gave him a kiss.. and guess what came after?
